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The Beast Division is one of three divisions under the control of the Department for the Regulation and Control of Magical Creatures. It deals with all duties and problems concerning those magical creatures classified as a "Beast" by the Ministry of Magic. The Beast was created by Jim Hensen as a way for children to cope with becoming adults. After successfully creating Cookie Monster, Hensen felt that children should be able to grow with one of their favorite blue childhood heroes. So he cut out the cookies, brought in some teeth, fangs, and fur-tight short-shorts (further teaching children about modesty), and gave his new creation an intellectual background with a deep, soothing voice.

During his early years, The Beast learned to cope early on with a father who loved children a little too much, a non-existent mother, and a horrible bout of hair-ball coughing every goddamn morning. Upon acceptance and entrance into one of the nation's finest private schools, The Beast proved himself an invaluable asset to human-mutant-fluffy animal relations. In his spare time, he washed dishes and mowed Jesus' lawn so he could afford treatment for his addiction to the hair wax.

Throughout his adolescent and teenage years, he had an active social life, becoming the life of the party for many reasons, including his ability to calm people down with his soothing voice and superior intellect, fire people up with his acrobatics, and his ability to hang from the ceiling to do kegstands, freeing up all other participants to watch in fear and awe.

As he grew older, the Beast became increasingly distraught with his inability to pick up chicks. While they all said they liked him as a friend and laughed at his jokes, he just couldn't bump furries with them. Upon graduation from high school, this led Beast to travel abroad before his first semester at Oxford University.

Beast Division sub-departments

Known employees

Appearances

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